Opinion | Taking up space when you physically can’t

When being short is a part of how people perceive you, at times it can feel belittling. What does it mean to embrace all that you are, in order to enjoy the fullness of life? Illustration by WYATT LINCOLN, illustrator 

The comment, “Dang you’re short,” has been the bane of my existence. 

All of you hop-on-the-counter-to-grab-a-bowl people can attest to this — when you’re chatting with friends and you suddenly feel the pressure of an arm on top of your head, with little fingers blocking your line of sight. Then you hear the classic follow up, “You’re the perfect height for an arm rest.” 

Lisa Wong, video & podcast editor

The last time I got my height checked was with my pediatrician, pre-pandemic. I still remember that day because she told me, “You’re 5 foot!” I had always been teased that I was 4 feet or so. Now, I had an affirmed counter-argument from a doctor. I proudly restated that fact every time someone would ask me that lovely “how tall are you” question. They’d almost always retort with, “Are you sure?” “Yep. My pediatrician told me.” Because, who wouldn’t trust a pediatrician? 

Well, I’d been lovingly embracing all 5 feet, 1.66 yards, 60 inches, 152.4 centimeters of me for about four years. I’d accepted the fact that I’ve probably stopped growing by now. Five feet is a perfect number for a stopping point! Who needs an extra 2 or 3 inches to follow a perfect 5! I’ve reached the bar for an (almost) average height (Haha get it? Reached?).

Well, as it turns out, you can’t always trust your pediatrician. Earlier this semester, my roommate hit me with, “I really don’t think you’re 5 foot.” I dutifully replied, “Well, I am. My doctor told me so! You can measure me if you really don’t believe me.” Measure we did. 

The verdict came: “Oh, Lisa, you’re 4 '11.” I turned around and saw it for myself. Marked with the straightest bookedge we found, there it was. Below the 5 foot mark was my Trojan horse. We taped it off and marked it at 4'11” and 3/8.

I wasn’t the only one who was brought down (pun unintended) that night. My roommate ended up being one inch shorter than she thought too! We laughed and I got teased about it in group chats, “Your doctor saw 4 '11 and just felt bad for you.” 

Well, I forgive you, Doc. I’m proudly brandishing all this 4'11” and 3/8. 

Then I started thinking about how I had gotten to that point in the first place — being able to embrace my below average height status, that is. In elementary and middle school, I had always been one of the shortest in my classes. Any time we had to line up in height order, I found it embarrassing how it was always assumed I would be in front. When my brother got his growth spurt, people started asking if he was older. That hurt my eldest sibling pride more than I’d like to admit. 

Throughout childhood and that awkward preteen phase, I had always felt insecure about my height. People being able to do their handshakes right over your head definitely makes you feel overlooked, literally. But, gradually, I embraced all of my vertical shortcomings (I’m sorry, there’s just too many unintended puns), and it’s allowed me to feel bigger than I really am. 

The thing about taking up space when you physically can’t is that it comes down to intentional living. What is it that makes you feel the most alive and purposeful? It doesn’t have to be complex or just one thing. It can be going to the mountains to hike or cooking a meal with friends or both of those! 

I don’t mean to make it seem like you have to make sure every waking moment is filled with action and productivity. Rather, I want to encourage you to assess whether or not the way you carry yourself and live each day is rooted in something you value. 

People are multifaceted in a plethora of ways, and the ways we connect with the world and the communities around us can evolve as we do. I believe that each person has their own purpose and gift. It can be community service, teaching or movie-making. Intentionally putting yourself into spaces to exercise those gifts is one way to actively pursue being a part of something larger than yourself. 

I think at the root of it, loving the community and environment around you is what allows you to live the fullest you can. Surround yourself with those that encourage you to do and be better. Don’t be afraid of new things and keep your mind open to whatever comes your way. 

I never thought I’d be living in Southern California, but moving here has allowed me to blossom in ways I wouldn’t have imagined. I’ve found a love for journalism, gotten opportunities to serve the community around me, and connect with people deeply through the mundane and exciting — laughter-filled dinners at the caf or taking a spontaneous midnight beach trip. 

Focusing on those activities and moments fills my heart with joy. They’re reminders that I am seen and loved just as deeply as I am trying to love others. 

A lot of my personal beliefs of what my life’s purpose is stems from the Bible’s book of Romans, in chapter 12. Essentially, to love all with sincerity, to serve those around me humbly and pursue justice in all that I do. I am so far from where I want to be in achieving these goals, but I am trying my best, and honestly, I think that’s all that matters! 

Perhaps I wrote this for all my fellow short kings and queens, but the same concepts apply to everyone who’s felt small in some capacity. When you live well, put your energy and time into spaces that welcome you, that will allow you to flourish into a person larger than life in some way. Every person’s path to realizing what that means for them personally is unique, but I hope that you’d be gracious to yourself along that journey!