Opinion | ADHD, a silent struggle
Gracie Fleischman, sophomore political science major
Adderall, Focalin, Strattera, Ritalin, Wellbutrin, Lexapro, BuSpar and Vyvanse. These are all the drugs I’ve been prescribed to treat my attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, known as ADHD. Since I was diagnosed in eighth grade, I’ve tried all of these drugs with no lasting success, and with side effects ranging from depression to constant nausea.
When I first realized my mind-numbing inability to finish homework quickly or focus on conversations were symptoms of ADHD, I was ashamed. I thought if I just tried harder, if I just stayed up a little longer, I could overcome my inattention. That led to sleepless, stressful nights, and 13-year-old me went to bed far too late. Over time, it caused crippling anxiety and depression that was so bad I couldn’t go a week without having a panic attack.
“When I first realized my mind-numbing inability to finish homework quickly or focus on conversations were symptoms of ADHD, I was ashamed.”
When I heard classmates say, “Ugh, I have ADD” when they got an answer wrong, or “Oh I’m so ADD” when they forgot something, it made me angry. I was going through a roller coaster of taking prescription medications while they made fun of a learning difference I couldn’t control.
October is ADHD awareness month. The goal is to promote better knowledge about symptoms so people can get diagnosed, and recognize that people can be diagnosed with ADHD at any time. Young women like myself are usually not diagnosed until they are older because they don’t fit the stereotype of the hyperactive little boy, according to the American Psychological Association. Children of color are less likely to be diagnosed, according to a study from the American Academy of Pediatrics.
It is so important that people of all ages, genders and ethnicities get diagnosed and learn about the school and workplace accommodations that are available. I wish I had known during my difficult years in middle and high school. At Chapman, there are many accommodations available through Disability Servicesincluding peer notetakers, special arrangements for test taking and even alternate tables and chairs in classrooms.
If you have a hard time taking tests in a classroom, little sounds distract you or you can’t study in groups, don’t be ashamed. Having ADHD is simply a learning difference that you can treat with lifestyle changes, medication or therapy. I feel lucky that I discovered my diagnosis when I did because it allowed me to grow and mature. I am proud of my learning difference. I may work twice as hard as other people do for the same work, but I also have creative problem-solving skills and out-of-the-box ideas that are unique to me.
Please take care of your mental health and of those around you. If having a learning difference is making you self-doubt or experience anxiety or depression, reach out to someone you trust.